Don't Check Yourself at the Door

"Do you feel like you can express yourself fully at work? And if you did, what might happen?"

These were the questions I asked in my TEDx talk, "Don't Check Yourself at the Door," and they are the heart of the message I want to explore here.

Over the years, I have met countless incredible individuals who kept parts of themselves hidden in the workplace - a female executive with children at home who never mentioned them for fear it would affect her career prospects, a senior leader caring for his wife with a traumatic brain injury, or a data scientist who’s an accomplished violinist but never thought anyone would care to know. These stories are far too common, and they speak to the broader issue of how we hide aspects of ourselves in professional settings.

Now, more than ever, we need to create a more connected and human workplace. With the continued divisiveness in the world, we desperately need more connection and belonging. The feeling of belonging and connection isn't just a "nice to have"- it's a fundamental human need. According to Deloitte’s Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion report, over 61% of employees are hiding aspects of who they are from their coworkers. This impacts not only their well-being but also their sense of loyalty to the organization and their ability to innovate and thrive.

The Courage to Be Seen

In my TEDx talk, I shared the story of a leader who felt something was missing in his relationships with his team. Despite his professional success, there was a wall that kept people from opening up to him. I asked him, "What would happen if you revealed more of who you are?" So, he took a moment of courage and shared with one of his employees that he volunteers at a homeless shelter. This simple act of opening up led to an incredible moment of connection - he found out that his employee had once lived in a homeless shelter as a child.

This deeper human connection changed their dynamic and illustrated something powerful: showing up fully isn't just about you - it benefits everyone around you. It transforms relationships, builds trust, and allows us to see each other beyond our roles and titles.

The CORE Methodology for Authentic Leadership

I understand that showing up fully takes courage, especially in professional settings where there are often unspoken expectations to "fit in." That’s why I developed the CORE methodology - a framework designed to help individuals express more of who they are and build better connections with others:

C: Curious - Get curious about what you’re holding back and why. What makes you unique? What makes you "weird" in a good way? Embrace your quirks - they are what make you interesting and valuable.

O: Open - Be open to sharing with others and, at the same time, be open to receiving them with curiosity and nonjudgment. This openness creates a bridge to genuine understanding.

R: Release - Release your fears of judgment. Relax into the discomfort of vulnerability. It takes practice and might be difficult initially, but each small step will help you feel more comfortable being yourself.

E: Expand - Expand your understanding by including others and celebrating their differences and similarities. Create an environment where people feel encouraged to bring their full selves through the door.

A Human Workplace Starts with You

The workplace cultures we admire - like those at Patagonia or Microsoft - are built on the courage to show up fully and the willingness to create deeper, more meaningful connections. When we take the risk to be seen for who we really are, we inspire others to do the same, fostering workplaces that are more human, innovative, and resilient.

So, what about you? What are you hiding or holding back at work? What part of yourself could you bring forward to create deeper connections? I invite you to take that step. Because the world needs more people who are willing to be brave, embrace their individuality, and create better, more genuine connections.

If you missed my TEDx talk, watch it here: Don't Check Yourself at the Door. Let's work together to create a more connected world, one courageous act at a time.