Thinking About Boxes (Not the Cardboard Kind)

“The minute you label me, you negate me.” - Søren Kierkegaard

Recently, I found myself thinking about boxes. Not cardboard ones, although let’s be honest, they do pile up fast with online shopping. I’m talking about the conceptual boxes - the ones we put ourselves in and the ones we put other people in. And here’s the thing: it’s not because we’re judgmental - it’s because we’re human.

Our brains are wired to categorize. It’s a survival mechanism. A shortcut. He's a hunter. She's a healer. They're analysts. It helps us sort, decide, and move on. But here’s where it gets tricky: What keeps us safe can also keep us small. We don’t just use labels to organize the world - we start using them to define people. And that includes ourselves.

The Box I Once Believed In

For years, I defined myself as a “finance guy.” I was good with numbers, managed a big portfolio, and made strategic decisions. But that wasn’t the whole picture. I am also a father, an artist, an explorer, a creative problem solver, and a spiritual seeker. And once I gave myself permission to step outside the box, I realized: I didn’t need to choose between numbers and nuance. I could be both and so much more. And when I began seeing myself differently, something powerful happened: I started seeing others differently, too.

Everything changes when you move beyond someone’s resume or title and start seeing the human behind the label. The colleague you thought was “quiet” turns out to be a musician. The client who seems guarded shares a story that moves you to your core. The team member who’s “just here to work” lights up when talking about their garden.

This is more than team-building. This is human revealing.

Three Simple Questions to Break the Box

If you want to practice this in real time at work, at home, or anywhere, try asking:

• What’s your favorite book and why?

• Is there a place in the world that feels like home to you?

• What’s something you do that fills you with joy, and what draws you to it?

They seem simple. But they open doors. Because when someone tells you what they love, you glimpse who they really are.

We live in a world of headlines, hot takes, and LinkedIn bios. Everything is reduced, compressed, and curated. But the richness of who we are lives in the unlabeled spaces - the corners, the colors, the unexpected combinations.

And here’s the beautiful twist: When you see others more fully, you also start to see yourself more fully. You realize: You’re not just your job. You’re not your past roles. You’re not your bio.

You’re a mosaic of passions, stories, contradictions, and light. So here’s your prompt: What’s one label you have outgrown - but are still living inside of? And… Who’s one person you’d like to get to know beyond their “box”? Start there. That’s where the expansion begins. Because when we think outside the box, we don’t just get more creative.
We get more connected. And that, I believe, is where real transformation lives.